Adaptive vs Maladaptive Shame
Dr. Laura Markham explains how punishment leads to shame and how toxic shame leads to struggles with anxiety, depression and addictions: http://www.ahaparenting.com/blog/_punishment_shaming_children
Books About Mindfulness / Self-Compassion
When Things Fall Apart. By Pema Chodron Self-Compassion. By Kristen Neff Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life. By Steven Hayes